The Workout Enigma

I don't know what it is about working out that gets me all pissed off. I hate...HATE working out! Everyday my husband will ask me, no... tell me, that we are going to the gym and I always throw a temper tantrum like a 5 year old spoiled brat that has been asked to give her favorite Barbie doll to charity. I get super grumpy and I snap at him and pick fights about it. I bitch to him the entire time I'm getting my gym clothes on and all the way to the gym. It will take me at least 20 minutes to even get ready for the gym when it should only take me 5. I make excuses for not wanting to go (I'm sick, I'm too tired, I cleaned the house and I'm counting that as my cardio for the day).
When I am at the gym I am still in my grumpy state. I hate that the televisions at a gym are always on a channel that's more for men or butch women than women like me. I want to watch some Saved By the Bell or maybe even a Lifetime movie. The other day I was at the gym and my television options were CNN, Nascar or Basketball, not very motivating material for me. I know that I have the option to watch something on my iPod or listen to some music but there's an issue for me there as well. On my iPod, all I have to watch is Step Up 2: The Streets, Breakfast at Tiffany's or one episode of Entourage (because it's my favorite episode and buying a whole season is expensive). I've listened to my music a million and one times and so I get sick of songs easily and I don't have Limewire anymore to download something new. If I could find a way to bring my mini (well not so mini) DVD player and find an elliptical close to a wall outlet I would be set. Unfortunately though, that is not an option. I've even looked to see if my camera had a headphone jack so that I could just record a half hour to an hour long program...but it doesn't.
So I'm stuck there for an hour or more watching boring TV and listening to songs I've heard over and over again and podcasts that I don't find all that entertaining when I'm in a bad mood.
The weird thing is, is that when it's all over and my husband says "lets go home" I feel better. I'm in a much better mood, I feel energized and clear headed. I love the end result of a good long workout. It's everything that leads to the end result that I hate. If only I could look ahead and realize that I do indeed need to do the work in order to get the high maybe I could break the mental block I have about working out. I don't know why I can't though. So here I go to the gym for the day, kicking and screaming as usual.
**Christina**